In his book, “Just Like Jesus,” well known author Max Lucado identifies a major challenge in human relationships, feelings of “stuckness. He defines stuckness this way:
“Attacks of stuckness are limited to people who breathe and typically occur between life and death. It manifests as irritability, short fuses and a mountain range of mole hills.”
Lucado first experienced stuckness when he was given a puppy named Liz for Christmas.
He writes: I carried her all day, her floppy ears fascinated me. So what if she smelled like a dog, whined and did business on my pillow? I kept her watered and fed. I combed her hair and kept her tail wagging.
But within a few days I had grown weary of her barking and she seemed hungry an awful lot. More than once my parents reminded me, “she is your dog. Not just your dog to play with, but your dog period.” Lucado observes: “perhaps you know the phobia that comes with commitment, only you’re not told, “she is your dog,” but, “he is your husband,” “she is your wife,” “he is your boss,” “she is your roommate.” And you feel stuck.
Are their opportunities that can emerge from stuckness? Lucado says it depends on how we respond to it. One option is to flee, to get out of the relationship and start again. But we will often find that the same issues will emerge in relationships we seek elsewhere. Another option is to fight, but then houses become war zones and offices become boxing rings.
A third option, (and it is the one that Lucado recommends) is to forgive people and show mercy. He points to the time that Jesus took on the role of a servant and washed his disciple’s feet. He notes that the story doesn’t say: “Jesus washed everyone’s feet accept Peter who denied him, Judas who betrayed him or Thomas who doubted him.” He washed their feet fully aware of the hurt they were going to cause.
But Jesus was not just forgiving their sins. He was setting an example of what we should do. Jesus forgave those who wronged Him and if we claim him as Savior and Lord, He has empowered us to do the same, to respond to unkindness with kindness and unconditional grace.
If a major challenge we face is difficulty forgiving those whom we feel stuck with, Lucado asks us to respond to a difficult question: “If foot washing were still a custom today, would you be willing to wash the feet of someone you feel stuck with?” The answer to that question reveals our commitment to demonstrating Christ like attitudes in all of our relationships-especially in those relationships we feel “stuck” in.
- Terry Harris
Diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy when he was two years old, Terry Harris in the opinion of many experts within the medical and education professions, would never walk, talk, read, write or go to a regular school. It was recommended to his parents that he beplaced in an institution. In 1995 Terry graduated from Brock University with a B.A. in English Literature and obtained a degree in marriage and family therapy in 1999 from Tyndale Seminary.
“Attacks of stuckness are limited to people who breathe and typically occur between life and death. It manifests as irritability, short fuses and a mountain range of mole hills.”
Lucado first experienced stuckness when he was given a puppy named Liz for Christmas.
He writes: I carried her all day, her floppy ears fascinated me. So what if she smelled like a dog, whined and did business on my pillow? I kept her watered and fed. I combed her hair and kept her tail wagging.
But within a few days I had grown weary of her barking and she seemed hungry an awful lot. More than once my parents reminded me, “she is your dog. Not just your dog to play with, but your dog period.” Lucado observes: “perhaps you know the phobia that comes with commitment, only you’re not told, “she is your dog,” but, “he is your husband,” “she is your wife,” “he is your boss,” “she is your roommate.” And you feel stuck.
Are their opportunities that can emerge from stuckness? Lucado says it depends on how we respond to it. One option is to flee, to get out of the relationship and start again. But we will often find that the same issues will emerge in relationships we seek elsewhere. Another option is to fight, but then houses become war zones and offices become boxing rings.
A third option, (and it is the one that Lucado recommends) is to forgive people and show mercy. He points to the time that Jesus took on the role of a servant and washed his disciple’s feet. He notes that the story doesn’t say: “Jesus washed everyone’s feet accept Peter who denied him, Judas who betrayed him or Thomas who doubted him.” He washed their feet fully aware of the hurt they were going to cause.
But Jesus was not just forgiving their sins. He was setting an example of what we should do. Jesus forgave those who wronged Him and if we claim him as Savior and Lord, He has empowered us to do the same, to respond to unkindness with kindness and unconditional grace.
If a major challenge we face is difficulty forgiving those whom we feel stuck with, Lucado asks us to respond to a difficult question: “If foot washing were still a custom today, would you be willing to wash the feet of someone you feel stuck with?” The answer to that question reveals our commitment to demonstrating Christ like attitudes in all of our relationships-especially in those relationships we feel “stuck” in.
- Terry Harris
Diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy when he was two years old, Terry Harris in the opinion of many experts within the medical and education professions, would never walk, talk, read, write or go to a regular school. It was recommended to his parents that he beplaced in an institution. In 1995 Terry graduated from Brock University with a B.A. in English Literature and obtained a degree in marriage and family therapy in 1999 from Tyndale Seminary.
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