Why do we do what we do? Why have you and I ‘chosen’ to serve persons with exceptional needs as a ministry career? Maybe we’re a little like Henri Nouwen, a renowned theologian who ‘found’ himself through unexpected turns of events serving at a L’Arche community in Toronto in the late 70’s. Completely unprepared for what ‘serving those with exceptional needs’ really meant he entered into a soul searching journey that changed his life – and his theology. This question of “why am I here” is one that we must occasionally reflect on. The answer to that question critically forms the ‘how’ we do what we do. I recently read Nouwen’s book, “Adam, God’s beloved”. In that book Henri reflects, “I must confess that there were moments when I was impatient and preoccupied by what I was going to do when I had finished Adam’s “routine”. Then without being conscious of his person, I started to rush him. Consciously, but mostly unconsciously, I hurriedly pushed his arms through his sleeves or his legs through his trousers. I wanted to be sure I was finished by 9:00 A.M. so I could go and do my other work. Right there I learned that Adam could communicate! He let me know that I wasn’t being really present to him and was more concerned about my schedule than his. A few times when I was so pushy he responded by having a grand mal seizure, and I realized it was his way of saying, “slow down, Henri! Slow down.” (Henri J.M. Nouwen, Adam: God’s Beloved, Orbis Books 1977 p 47).
Sadly, I see moments in my own ‘ministry career’ that sound similar to Henri’s experience . It is so easy to lose our core focus of what we do. We need to continually be challenging ourselves, allow ourselves to being challenged by others, and mostly by those whom we serve. That challenge? NOT to forsake the reason of our calling – to serve, too be present in the lives of people. Can we take this too far? I don’t know, but, I do know we’re along long way from finding out ‘how far is too far’. We must be about being “present” with people (each word purposely emphasized). It is so easy for us to get distracted by our schedules, our agendas, our ideas of efficiencies – that we can be endanger of losing our effectiveness. What does it mean for us to be effective? I think we need to constantly re-evaluate and wrestle out the whole struggle of efficient vs effective. It may not be efficient to take the extra time required to wait for someone to do something at their own pace, it may not be efficient to have someone who ‘moves slower’ do a task that we can complete quicker, or may get the order mixed up, or causes momentary distractions because of an ‘episode’ or because they may require extra support to complete the task, or it causes other ‘inconveniences’ – We can be far more efficient, but we lose our effectiveness. What is our goal, what does it mean for us to be effective? Do we want to be efficient with people, or effective? To be efficient means the other person must change and be able to accommodate us, reach our expectations, and satisfy our demands. To be effective, means we must be willing to change, be able to accommodate, adjust to reachable expectations and create demands that meet the dignity, value and inclusion of who we say our vision is about. We must be willing to be disrupted, disturbed and distracted if it means that we become effective. Here’s the rub, most of the things that disrupt my world, disturb my sensibilities, and distract my attention are MY PROBLEM and need to be confronted. I go back to my opening question, ‘Why do we do we do what we do’? If we’re not willing to be confronted and uncomfortable and change how we ‘do’ with that question of why, Lord help us.
When I look at the approach of Jesus in the Gospels, he wasn’t very efficient. He let people slow Him down, distract Him with their problems and needs, ask seemly foolish questions – change and disrupt His schedule – and He let them do it over and over. However we certainly would not question His effectiveness, because he was clear about His purpose to let people see the Father
Philip said, ‘Jesus, show us the Father’, I have been with you so long as you don’t know me yet’ Jesus replied Jn 14:9
May all we do, all we are about, be about whom we have been called to serve. May we continually challenge each other with love, respect and dignity to go further, risk more, walk slower, give more room, create more opportunities, grant more power to those we have been called to serve. I wonder if our greatest effectiveness will be reached when the lines between those who are supported and those who support are kinda blurry.
Anyway, I was just thinking,
Neil
Sadly, I see moments in my own ‘ministry career’ that sound similar to Henri’s experience . It is so easy to lose our core focus of what we do. We need to continually be challenging ourselves, allow ourselves to being challenged by others, and mostly by those whom we serve. That challenge? NOT to forsake the reason of our calling – to serve, too be present in the lives of people. Can we take this too far? I don’t know, but, I do know we’re along long way from finding out ‘how far is too far’. We must be about being “present” with people (each word purposely emphasized). It is so easy for us to get distracted by our schedules, our agendas, our ideas of efficiencies – that we can be endanger of losing our effectiveness. What does it mean for us to be effective? I think we need to constantly re-evaluate and wrestle out the whole struggle of efficient vs effective. It may not be efficient to take the extra time required to wait for someone to do something at their own pace, it may not be efficient to have someone who ‘moves slower’ do a task that we can complete quicker, or may get the order mixed up, or causes momentary distractions because of an ‘episode’ or because they may require extra support to complete the task, or it causes other ‘inconveniences’ – We can be far more efficient, but we lose our effectiveness. What is our goal, what does it mean for us to be effective? Do we want to be efficient with people, or effective? To be efficient means the other person must change and be able to accommodate us, reach our expectations, and satisfy our demands. To be effective, means we must be willing to change, be able to accommodate, adjust to reachable expectations and create demands that meet the dignity, value and inclusion of who we say our vision is about. We must be willing to be disrupted, disturbed and distracted if it means that we become effective. Here’s the rub, most of the things that disrupt my world, disturb my sensibilities, and distract my attention are MY PROBLEM and need to be confronted. I go back to my opening question, ‘Why do we do we do what we do’? If we’re not willing to be confronted and uncomfortable and change how we ‘do’ with that question of why, Lord help us.
When I look at the approach of Jesus in the Gospels, he wasn’t very efficient. He let people slow Him down, distract Him with their problems and needs, ask seemly foolish questions – change and disrupt His schedule – and He let them do it over and over. However we certainly would not question His effectiveness, because he was clear about His purpose to let people see the Father
Philip said, ‘Jesus, show us the Father’, I have been with you so long as you don’t know me yet’ Jesus replied Jn 14:9
May all we do, all we are about, be about whom we have been called to serve. May we continually challenge each other with love, respect and dignity to go further, risk more, walk slower, give more room, create more opportunities, grant more power to those we have been called to serve. I wonder if our greatest effectiveness will be reached when the lines between those who are supported and those who support are kinda blurry.
Anyway, I was just thinking,
Neil
2 comments:
This is a beautiful, thought-provoking blog. There is a typo in it, however. "To be effective, means we must being will to change" should be something like "To be effective means we must be willing to change."
Just a nit-pick.
This blog reminds us that need to constantly be mindful of why we are doing this work and who we are here to serve. Especially with the ongoing process of accreditation, it is easy to get caught up in efficiency and loose sight of the patience and compassion it takes to be an effective helper.
As you pointed out in an earlier blog, Christ changed our focus from the letter of the law to the spirit of the Word. While we can't forget about the rules and bureaucratic expectations of our job, using his example we need to keep re-focusing on the spirit of our service. It is a fine line and a tricky balancing job.
I wonder what it would look like for the lines between the person being served and the person providing service to become blurry. Don't they discourage that kind of thing in professional institutions? I'd like to hear thoughts about this...
Thanks Gordon for the correction. As a raving dyslexic (true) I appreciate the help. Your comment raises a constant tension for us. The institutional approach was a medical model where the person with a disability was deemed as a patient/an object with an 'illness' to be 'treated' and kept separate from the 'normal' society. Even with our person centred approach I think sometimes we've yet some distance to travel. If our goal is truly value the dignity as persons and not treat as patients with a disease, our definition of 'professional' must change. Maybe we need to find another word all together. I'm thinking that even setting myself up as a professional communicates volumes about the value and dignity others. Jesus didn't approach us as a professional, but entered into our space, walked our speed, spoke our language, washed our feet. We feel, I feel it, the need to 'separate' myself with titles, accomplishments, abilities and position. We define ourselves by these things, but to often forget that I'm also defining those around me in a pecking order of some sort. We've come along way in this 'field', but we have much further to go -- and it's us that needs to do the changing - we create the separation so we can be 'professional'. Not to say that we do not need to serve with excellence, training and insight - but the goal of all that professionalism is not to elevate ourselves and serve down, but we become professional at serving up,elevating and empowering the lives of others.
Post a Comment